QUESTION OF THE MONTH, Are you a SIDELINE HOE????

That is the title of one of Monica's songs on her new cd, "The Makings Of me". Now ya'll know I ain't nevah scurred (You betta AXE somebody), but as she so eloquently stated during her performance last weekend, you could be the Sideline Hoe and not even know it.

Here are a few signs that you, yes you, Ms. THANG, could be his chick on Da Side. Peep these inDICKations that you are just that, the Sideline Hoe.....

1. He calls you whispering, talkin bout his Grandma is sleep....
2. You get nothing but Voicemail after 9:30 pm.
3. You always here water in the background when he can finally call you back (Fool, he is calling you while he is taking a ISH)
4. He tells you that he is only with her for the kids, but once that little baby, TAY TAY Jr, gets into HeadStart he is out tha door!
5. His baby momma is pregnant, but once she has the baby, he is out tha door.
6. They just live in the same house, he sleeps in the den (now you know he is tappin that ery chance he gets)
7. He can't take a shower at your place and if he does he doesn't use any SOAP!!
8. Better yet he just washes his dick in yo kitchen sank and wipes his balls with yo over mitt (Girl, just start running.....)
9. Dinner and a movie with him is Chicken Nuggets, a large fry and a fuzzy ass bootleg copy of "Beauty Shop".....

Now there are many different positions you can play on the team.
1. Wifey
Now she gets all the benefits, i.e., The Credit cards, The Auto, The trips, the jewelry, BUT don't sleep she gets all the BULLSHIT!!! The attitudes, the Moodiness... all that FUCK HOE SHIT!!

2. Mistress
She may get a few trinkets and a Ford Focus, but she doesn't have to put up with that BULLSHIT!!!! The Real FUCKERY. She has him a cold drank waiting when he gets there, wearing her VIcky Secretions and will lick his scalp if he asked her to do so.

3. The Lil Momma
She ain't a mistress, so no car for her, but she is more than a Jump Off. He'll get her hair and nails DID! But she just anotha piece he keeps on tha side. She probably just likes to wear sweatsuits, New AirForces and a ponytail, a GENIE Ponytail. More than likely she has a Gold TOOTH and all her babies daddies names across her tittays!

3. THE Jump Off
She just getting fucked! No spare change, no kisses, no nothing! Just dick, but SHYT, sometimes that's all you Really, really want!!! UUUMMMKKKaayyy!

All that to say, if you are going to play your position, play it well. Shit you can play all 4 at the same time, if you are diverse and that neer won't make a move!! But just remember he has his positions to play as well, but they think they are just so damn Slick and GREASY!!

You may just have to show him who really is as GREAZY as Baby Oil.....

JUST DO U, ma, DO U!

I'll holla!!!